THIS SHOW. 

Hello Reader of this post, 

As a follower of my beloved Saviour Jesus Christ, I am called to lay out the things of my heart in hope that I plant the seed of truth, and glorify the gospel of Christ. 

In this post, I hope to contribute to the ongoing conversation regarding mental health and suicide. I will also discuss and compare my faith in Christianity in contrast to the novel-turned Netflix original series, 13 Reasons Why by Jay Asher. 

In the short but powerful TV drama 13 Reasons Why, the viewing audience is quickly made aware that Hannah Baker is dead.  A troubled high school student that we come to know through several self-recorded tapes, documenting the people and reasons behind her decision to end her life. 
Apart from the extensive and graphic topics of suicide, the series explores mature themes such as: bullying, alcoholism, drug-use, self-harm, domestic violence, gun violence, and rape. 
By the final episode, I was heartbroken and absolutely gutted. 

To me, this series reaffirms the distance between God and all of us; highlighting the penalty of our sin which has brought trial, pain, and suffering to this world. 

Of course I wouldn’t blame Hannah or anyone for feeling pain towards those who did them wrong. This is expected, and in a way, an inherited human trait; without God, our unfortunate circumstances can define us, but it doesn’t have to.
“We all, like sheep, have gone astray,
 each of us has turned to our own way;
 and the Lord has laid on him
 the iniquity of us all.” (Isaiah 53:6 NIV) 

But. What I have stated above, is not the entire gospel truth; for Jesus has felt the pain of sin we committed before and forever. Jesus died in our place, and rose again so that we may have LIFE. His blood shed on the cross is the greatest sacrifice for all human brokenness, human pain, human suffering, and human sin. Our life is restored through a perfect saviour.

In 13 Reasons Why I feel the opposite is true. Death is a logical means to a literal end; relief of self, words and feelings are actually heard, and death represents victory from devastation. It pains me that for some, this is truth. 

My faith has inspired me to believe that we are not meant to die in vain. The intention of Christ for us was never to succumb to the paths of mental, emotional, and physical brokenness. 

In conclusion, I pray in all ways we seek a solution bigger than ourselves. May we flee from evil and put on peace. For our Lord is kind, and turns us from being weathered to renewed in spirit. In Christ’s transformative name, 
“May the Lord direct your hearts into God’s love and Christ’s perseverance.”

2 Thessalonians 3:5 | NIV

May life win. 

Today is the 23rd

1 month since giving my life to Christ. 

3 weeks since I said ‘YES!’ to you.  

It’s Tuesday! 

Today is the 23rd. 

Through peace-covered excitement, and set in stone commitments, I took my life from my hands and sealed my soul to my God, my Saviour, and my eternal friend. 
Then as Daddy’s do for their daughters, I believe, within the peace I had through baptism, He gave me to you. 
It’s been 3 weeks, and I can’t hold in how much I love you. Oh, how Christ has secured our likeness, our faith, and our love – all praises to Him!! 

It’s Tuesday! 

Today is the 23rd. 

A Great Hold

I’m more honest in my writing when sleep is asking why I’m still up…
I’ve been prompted to write my heart, and here it is, 
I have a great hold on my life; a grasp on my heart that can’t let go. Won’t let go. And I ask, ‘don’t let go.’ Could this be God? Yes, I believe it very much is. Could it just be me…thinking too much? Yes, I believe it very much is.  

Is this great grasp comfortable? Yes, but no. Is this great grasp effective? Yes, but no. 

I listened to a very good sermon today; observing topics of how God, in the beginning, gave Adam and Eve a rightful spot in creation; they were perfection along with the rest of God’s work. But then they turned away. They were evicted. God removed their position, and cast them out of His detailed picture. They wore sin as clothing, and they realized it. But still…there was a great hold on their life. 

The time of Easter is a road map that God asks us to follow. His work of painting us in, and out of the Garden, but seeking us to come back — dying on a tree for me /shedding his blood/ casting His soul so mine can return. Back. 

This is my great hold: 

  • The keystone that leads my heart is my Lord-the Saviour- Jesus. This great hold is grasping so tenderly for my attention, my mind, my heart. Here it is — I give you all of it, and the broken beats. Here, oh God, take back the heart that you made, and give it a life-beat, a heart-beat that remains in you. 
  • My love, this is for you. I choose to remain in you — even though, like them, I strayed from the Garden. I will always come back. I choose you! You are my first human choice —- under my heavenly choice. You have the heart I imagine Him to have too. This is why I love you. You have a great hold on me. You are my loveliest gift, and truest hope in life. Shalom, you are my peace. 

As this week follows, I pray for a great hold on the world. That the world will find His outstretched palm – the One who lays his life on behalf of his friends – Jesus – the One with a great hold over me. 

Amen

Mustard Seeds

He told them another parable: “The kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed, which a man took and planted in his field. Though it is the smallest of all seeds, yet when it grows, it is the largest of garden plants and becomes a tree, so that the birds come and perch in its branches.  Matthew 13:31-32

I realized today in church that I’ll be doing some major ‘seed planting’ this year, next month, a few years, and preferably, a lifetime from now. 

Today, I was mainly fixed on the idea that next month I’ll have a new birthday. I’m getting baptized!

I turned 22 in June, but as of August I’ll be a bright, glowing, puffy – eyed newborn —- taking my first breathes of God-renewed life as a born-again, Christian. 

I’m thrilled to be taking the plunge (literally) and professing all that I have been given in life, back to the Creator of my life! 

My life-long commitment —- I’m sewing my soul with my greatest discovery, my truest friend, and my only hope. 

I’m not even there yet, and I’m feeling a mountains worth of grace-upon-grace-upon- grace. 

Look out trees…I’m’a comin’ 



truly complete 

Something I’ve learned from the Bible is this: God is the essential to life and love; holding our smallest wants to our grandest purposes between his almighty palms. Evidently we are lost without God; his imprint on our hearts and lives is necessary to fill us completely, otherwise we turn to the world for this ‘fill’ instead.

 


 

Me Before You inspires a tender message of the power of compassion, the complexities of life, love, and also has two really good Ed Sheeran songs.

I was swept up one summer’s eve, when I saw the movie trailer about a physically disabled man and his caregiver falling in deep L-O-V-E, love. Aside from the appropriateness of this relationship, one is quickly clued in as to why this story will indeed, rip. your. heart. out.

The charming but disturbed leading man, Will Traynor, and the adorable but clueless, Louisa Clark, take us on a journey of what it’s about to ‘live bodly,’ while tackling the controversial ideas of choosing to die when the boldness of life seem impossible to attain.

Throughout the story, one naturally sympathizes with Will Traynor; a young man who once lived on the highest levels of success, adventure, and excitement — now after years of little improvement and compromised goals, he is left bitter, depressed, and tormented by the limitations of his life as a quadriplegic man; this which encourages his conclusions of ending his own life after the duration of six months.

Admirably Louisa is set on changing his mind, and takes it upon herself to think up fun/inspiring ideas to help Will realize the value to his life and her love for him despite his focus on his own disabilities. Her professional role as caregiver quickly turns to an urgent personal responsibility of fighting for life, love, and hope.

The final impression from this story was partly inspirational, incredibly sweet, and sad. It goes to show that I’ll always be a sucker for anything lovely-dovey, and anything A Walk to Remember-ish. I loved this book/film, but I’m left with that half-hearted feeling…like something didn’t quite settle properly.

Frankly, the love between two people fell short. All efforts failed. Sad, but true.

( *Hold the phone* )

How possible is it that the underlying innuendo of all this is that, everything falls short without God at the centre? When we depend solely on ourselves or each other, and do not look to God, the perfect author, maker, and teacher of completeness, we are headed for complete despair.

Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires.  The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. Romans 8:5-6

God is the only avenue of true love and life. We can rely on ourselves but love from God is the only thing that can truly save us. He is a faithful lover of his creation, and He hopes for us to naturally seek him to find ultimate completeness in Him. He is the only way we can completely love, completely live, and completely change and transform our minds. He is eternal love and eternal life. We die without God, and everything else is an unreliable source.

Ultimately, I think the “tell me something good” message of Me Before You was meant to emphasize that life is meant to be lived, and not lived through. Everyone has the potential to be bold, and become their best self. But, life and love are gifts that don’t have to be accepted —- the choice is ours.

But God outlines a different option that unwraps our despair, and fills us with meaning, life, and love.

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

 

 

 

 

to love Him, is to love him

I’ve noticed a rather disheartening thing:

I haven’t picked up my Bible in a week, I’ve abandoned the devotional series I’ve been studying, and I also haven’t pinned to my ‘All Jesus Everything’ board on Pinterest for some time now. The gas is a tad low in the faith department.

It’s really been bothering me, and I’ve noticed that I’ve traded my precious ‘grace’ time with God, for ‘screen’ time. It’s not good at all, and it weighs my heart with disappointment.

Though, awareness is key and this is something that I can change.

Another burning thought, or grouping of thoughts that I’ve been processing is that,I have never been baptized. * GASP *

I think if you listen extra hard, you can hear the universal hum of ‘HUH?!’ harmonizing over the rolling hills and valley’s across the Christian community. * GASP AGAIN *

These past few years, I don’t hesitate to acknowledge that I am a follower of Christ. I believe this is my most valuable area of development thus far.

But in all seriousness, baptism should not be dependent on how others feel, but in fact a declaration about how you feel about God; it’s a public ‘I love you,’ that God influences Christians to say just at the right time.

Ever since I began dating the wonderful man in my life, baptism has been a pending thought on my heart and mind. I feel God’s boundless love emulated through my relationship, and this has been a consistent sentiment of God since it began. I’m never short of my I love you’s in my relationship, but I know I have to put this in to practice to the one who allows me to say this: God.

So, what better gift to give than my life back God? He has redeemed my soul, walked with me through all my experiences, and given me the desire to seek him.

Before I commit myself to a man, I must let God be the first to know that I am committed to Him.

May my faith and love continue to flourish, and my heart sing a lifetime of praises!

To love Him, is to love him.

Purple & Extraordinary Things

Purple is my favorite color. I like it because…I just do. But I also like it because it’s something that pleases my eyes.

Soft Purple:
It’s brilliant the ways that God changes our lives.
In the beginning when it hits you…sometimes you have no idea that it’s even hit you. You begin a new adventure – something exciting, something wonderful, and you know it, but you really don’t. All you know at that time is that it is good.

Grey Purple:
It’s inspiring the way God works in our lives.
You are reminded every day that you are a cherished child that God, and He loves perfectly – but even children need to grow.

This is one of the deepest shades, and where you begin to understand that purple is a little more than one consistent color. God prompts you for his plan, and promotes change all over again.
This time the change is in you.

Purple:
Then, in a wonderful and mysterious way, God opens our eyes for us to see Him. We can see Him!
I am so filled up, and spiritually thrilled!
I’m purple. I’m bright and beautiful, purple!

It’s extraordinary the way God blesses us in life, promotes change, and clears our lenses to see his wonderful plan…. His amazing glory.

I wrote in my journal once that I wanted something extraordinary to happen to me; I was open for what God wanted to reveal in my life and within myself. He certainly has.

Purple is still my favorite color, and I’m thankful for my life, and the many hues and blends of it.

“God open my eyes to see how you are setting me up. Give me the courage to go along.”